If anything can go wrong, it will.

Establish Dominance!

Beauregard B. Furpants

Beauregard B. Furpants. Or just Beau works.

I have the world’s most overly-attached little stalker of a cat. Oh, and well, he’s actually not so little, either.

He isn’t often allowed into the computer room, because of his tendency to rub up against everything as he tries to build up a static charge so that he can electrofuckulate you.

Or rather, me.

So, since the computer room is often where I am, and as I mentioned, he’s a stalker, he frequently sits right outside the door and waits for me to exit, so that he can follow me wherever it is I’m going, whether that’s to my bedroom, or to the toilet.

I spend an awful lot of time working (or playing) in Photoshop, and sometimes, I really get quite enthused with whatever it is I’m doing. So much so that I’ll ignore little distractions like the need to pee.

That’s a distraction that you can only ignore for so long.

On one such occasion, I was very nearly finished with a project, and ridiculously excited about how it was progressing. I just couldn’t wait to put the finishing touches on it. I got that first little notification from my bladder that it was approaching maximum capacity at just the wrong time. Just a few more brush strokes, so close… must finish!

When I was finally satisfied with the project, I just knew I’d delayed a bit too long. I dropped my tablet,  and made for the door with my bladder absolutely screaming at me for my foolishness. Right outside my door, waiting for me, was Beau.

I hurried to the bathroom with my cat right on my heels, quite literally. I nearly tripped over him as I rushed in and closed the door behind me. I undid my button and dropped trou as quickly as humanly possible, and this is where one of us, I’m not sure which, maybe both, made a fatal mistake.

Beau had positioned himself behind my legs, in front of the base of the toilet. I dropped my jeans right on his head, and of course, he moved out from under them. As I bent to sit on the toilet, I put just a tiny bit too much pressure on my overloaded bladder, and unfortunately, a slight trickle escaped.

My poor cat. He was in just the wrong place at just the wrong time, and that little trickle… it landed right on his head.  You can imagine his disgust and irritation.

To add insult to injury, naturally he had to have a bath.

On the up side, he was honestly the most well-behaved cat for about a week.

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